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Word Alive
After An 18-Year Separation
September 1, 2012, 9:51pm
Taken from Manila Bulletin
MANILA, Philippines — Let me share an inspiring story, testifying to the transformative effect of Marriage Encounter on troubled couples.
In 1973, Fred and Mila de Guzman (not their real names) exchanged “I do’s” in a solemn wedding ceremony in church.
* * *
After the wedding and honeymoon, both Fred and Mila were still floating on Cloud 9. But they could not live on love alone. So Fred resumed his real estate business while Mila took care of their new home.
Soon their first child was born, followed by a second after a year. But barely two years after, Mila began hearing rumors that Fred was having relations with his office secretary. Confronted about it, Fred would just brush it aside.
* * *
As the days went by, Mila’s intuition told her that the business trips were more of “monkey business.” True enough a few months later, Fred started to come home late regularly, triggering off endless fights and quarrels.
It didn’t take long before Fred dropped out of sight completely. “This lasted for 18 years! We had no Sta. Claus for that long and our Christmases were really sad and painful,” Mila reminisced.
* * *
Within the span of 18 years, Fred lived with the other woman, eventually siring two children. Despite the broken marriage, Fred didn’t lose his generous spirit. He supported the schooling of a seminarian son of a family friend.
One day, the mother of the seminarian told him something that jolted his senses. “Kompare, I appreciate your generosity but what you’re doing, having a second family, is not right.” “Why don’t you straighten your life?” she added, “How about joining our Marriage Encounter community?”
* * *
“The words kept ringing in my ears and brought me to my senses,” Fred confessed. “Eventually, that led me and my wife to the door of a marriage rebirth,” he said.
“My wife and I were crying out of shame and guilt in that ME weekend,” he said. “I realized how I had desecrated the ‘sacrament’ of our marriage.”
* * *
After that eye-opening experience, Fred resolved to sort out the mess he created and returned to where they began. “The re-entry of Fred was difficult,” Mila related. It took eight months to work out things with his live-in partner.
The other woman decided to go abroad and started a new life there. As for their two kids, Fred and Mila took them into their home.
* * *
Looking back, Mila said, “I considered the whole experience a ‘miracle.’ Imagine, 18 years of separation with no hope of ever reconciling.
“Because of our experience, Fred and I have been giving talks as presenting couple in ME weekends and our family with the two ‘adopted children’ has been active in Family Encounters.
* * *
“For married couples who have a similar problem as ours, there’s hope,” Fred and Mila affirm. “All that’s needed is the spirit of forgiveness and openness to begin a new life.” And a support group like Marriage Encounter community.
* * *
The 8wanders of MESF-62
(The Friendship that started because of M.E.)
By: Raquel Jamir Samoy MESF-62
We all started as “CLASSMATES” during the MESF-62 weekend seminar last August 2011. We don’t even take a “GLIMPSE” at each other during our seminar. Even after our graduation, we only “BID” goodbye to them. After two weeks came our first “REUNION”, we met each other again and just said “HI” and “HELLO”. We only KNEW each other because of our I.D.’s and also during our SHARING as couple. We never TALKED to each other more often even after the reunion.
As per our knowledge is concerned, we were obliged to attend every Reunion just for the sake of completing our TASK. We never noticed that a “FRIENDSHIP” begins to grow. Maybe it is because of our “SHARING” as a COUPLE based on our real experience. And because of being honest with each other’s feeling, we gained each other’s “TRUST” (not the condom…Joke!).
It is like a person falling in “LOVE”, when there is a sudden SPARK in your heart, for sure you will MISS each other automatically. But as time goes by, we are so excited to see each other as well as we want to see each other more often. We miss and love each other’s company. Our FRIENDSHIP bonded us together as ONE.
Even in good times and in bad times. We never loose our hope especially when challenges came our way. We worked together as one. We share our happiness and laughter’s every time we are together. We are like brothers and sisters. We never imagined that we have come this far. With our experiences while being together, we never felt EMPTY. All we got are “BLESSINGS” from our One and Only GOD. Thank You So Much.
With this article, I would like to extend my sincere gratitude to our MESF family, our TEAM COUPLES and most of all to our dear ELDERS for bringing US together as ONE. WE will never forget you. You can count on Us. WE are looking forward to pursue our dreams in the near future. MORE and MORE and MORE” BLESSINGS” TO COME OUR WAY. To the CAST of 8wanders and also my INSPIRATIONS: Bro. Louie & Sis. Gleng Cruz, Bro. Ed & Sis. Marian Purisima, Bro. Paul & Sis. Che Enage (also in real life) and to my beloved husband Ross…KUDOS!!!
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